dare to disagree: a poem. thoughts on having an opinion

dare to open your eyes and see.

dare to see what you don’t want to see.

dare to notice, dare to take it.

dare to feel what’s right.

dare to not close your eyes in front of it.

dare to stand for it.

dare to not laugh when your dad makes a racist joke.

dare to avoid gossip.

dare to not be a part of a discussion when  your friends are judging someone.

dare to stand for yourself when someone is not treating you right. even if they’re older.

dare to shout when you’re expected to keep quiet.

dare to do what’s more difficult but feels right.

dare to leave.

dare to be left.

dare to stand straight and keep on going.

dare to be yourself and know what you believe in.

dare to disagree.

then dare to face your consciousness and walk away clean.

 

It doesn’t end with having an opinion. Standing for it is the hard part. Little quiet girls agreeing with everything, so they don’t have to start a conflict. Little loud boys doing everything that their friends are doing just to be perceived as cool. Grown up women smiling to their neighbors at a party and later telling their friends how terrible it was. Grown up men going to a hated job, everyday waking up with no desire to go there, but too afraid to quit. Lying to yourself and being in a constant fear is not what makes a life happy.

seeing the world through your own eyes

We are all different but very often we forget that. We all see things around us and perceive them in a certain way. It’s okay as long as we don’t realize that not everyone is feeling the same way. It’s weird, we think. And the deeper we go into this the more clearly we see that there are thousands of little thoughts and ideas that are understood by other people completely differently. Sometimes it seems that you are the only one who has this kind of opinion and you might feel lonely and weird. You start to compare yourself to others. It’s a natural and not necessarily a bad thing, but sometimes it becomes unhealthy. Sometimes we overstep the line and start to change ourselves in order to be as similar to others as possible, forgetting our own uniqueness and losing all the beautiful things that are hidden inside of our souls. I have felt lonely with my opinion. I always did things that I believed were right, but not always people agreed with me. As a child I thought that there was something wrong with me. It took me quite some time to realize that being different and daring to have your own opinion is not weird or bad, it’s beautiful and brave. Our minds are complex and unique that’s why we all take the same thing in different ways.

the struggle of keeping an opinion

Having a strong opinion and sticking to it under a big pressure is a very difficult thing. But, as always, the best things do not come in the easiest ways. I know it from my own experience. It’s easier to go with the flow. It’s easier to cheat and tell yourself that you don’t need to make revolutions and that you’re able to keep your opinion just to yourself, it’s easier to keep quiet and not cause any conflicts. But forming your own beliefs and staying consistent is a proof that you are a thinking, clever creature, able to see, understand things and make conclusions on your own. Fighting for these beliefs is a thing that you need to do constantly if you want to stay true to them. So it means that you have to fight with everyone who thinks differently than you do? No, you don’t. There is a difference between forcing other people to have the same opinion as you do and staying true to your own self. For example, you can have a great relationship with a smoking person even if you think that smoking is a bad thing. It doesn’t mean losing yourself. But agreeing to smoke together when the person is convincing you to does mean that. Sometimes it’s more complicated. If my friends were having a discussion about gay people and calling them names, leaving this topic alone and accepting that we have different opinions would not be enough for me. This is intolerance and as a tolerant person I wouldn’t feel okay by just staying quietly. Sticking to a certain mindset is a constant process of thinking with your own head and fighting quite often.

never change?

Having an opinion does not mean sticking to one truth your whole life and never changing, no matter what is happening around you or what you are experiencing. It is okay to change, it is beautiful to grow as a person. Seeing what’s happening around you, comparing the events and making conclusions sometimes leads to changing your opinion. And most of the times it’s a good thing which shows that your beliefs are well-founded. But it’s important that these changes happen not against your will. You have all the rights to choose what you believe in as long as you’re not hurting other people and nobody can force you to give up on things that are important to you. I have changed a lot through out the past few years, and my morality standards have changed but I have never felt that I’m self-contradictory. I just know that there were times when I saw things in a certain way and now I see the same things in a different way because now I know more, I have experienced more. The change is a natural thing.

it’s worth it

Sliding along the surface and doing everything that other people are doing won’t make you happy. When I tried to be like everyone else, I felt uncomfortable. It was so unnatural and I was able to feel the damage that I was causing to my own mind and self-esteem. We are better than this. We are brave enough to be ourselves. And even if this requires fighting, in the long term it’s worth it. That’s the thing about having an opinion, only through conflicts and disagreements it gets stronger and crystallizes. You get psychologically stronger. You see the world more clearly if you compare your beliefs to other people’s opinion, you start to see things from many different perspectives.

I don’t think that there are people who stay true and honest their whole lives. It’s too difficult, too inhuman. We all slip sometimes, but it’s up to us wether we work and improve to slip as little as possible or not. It’s hard to find the courage to stand for your beliefs in the time when everyone is free to judge and say whatever they want to. It’s scary. Sometimes knowing what’s right for you means standing alone, sometimes it means losing people that you used to call friends. Sometimes it’s just a discussion with a polite conclusion that you don’t always have to agree on everything. But at the end, the most important thing is facing your consciousness. I, personally, am doing everything to make sure it’s clear.

 

What’s your opinion on having an opinion? Leave a comment.

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